Blogoversary

Today is my first blogoversary. I definitely thought this feeling would be a lot more exciting (I'm not really sure why?), but really I don't give a shit.

I reread my first entry thinking I had come a long way in a year, but not much has really changed. Sam's 2nd birthday is tomorrow and I am still making arrangements for that as I was last year. I still have to get balloons, make his cupcakes, make cookies for the Ronald McDonald House, and go by the hospital to see his nurse. Trying to keep myself busy, I guess.

One would think/assume that a lot would change in 2 years time since his birth/death date, but it really hasn't. I don't cry as much, but that's about it. I think of them everyday, several times a day. I try to honor them in every which way I can. I want people to know about them. I want them to be just as real as I knew them. I don't ever want to forget them. Once we forget them, then they're nothing. And I can't let that happen. It's my job as their mother to keep their memory alive. If the rest of the world moves on and forgets about their existence, I will still be here...to always remember.

Happy F*cking Blogoversary to me.

Please come back tomorrow for Sam's birthday. I have a huge favor to ask of you all. Thanks for supporting me and offering kind and encouraging words throughout the last year. Truth is, if it weren't for this blog and you, I would be terribly lost and even sadder than I am now. Thank you.