"IT'S NOT THE LENGTH OF THE GESTATION, IT'S THE EXTENT OF THE ATTACHMENT."


Friday, December 21, 2007

Naive

I just realized that freezing embryos or eggs and sperm is not a back-up plan. It's a stalling technique so that when I'm old and baron Mr. H can decide he wants kids. Fuck that.

We slept apart last night for the first time in our marriage. I woke up sad without him.

I don't have anything else to say.

9 comments:

meg said...

Oh Monica, this thing is so hard. I'm sorry you're feeling so sad. I'm gonna email you, so look for that, if you feeling like reading.

Erica said...

I am so sorry.Has he been with you when you went to the Doctors so he was able to hear everything they said?Sending you lots of hugs and prayers.

Monica H said...

Erica- Yes he goes with me, but it seems that the more good news I get, the more resistant he is. I think he's hoping for someone to tell me that we can't have children so he can breathe a sigh of relief.

Kristi said...

Oh Monica, my heart was breaking for you last night. Call me if you want to get together to talk. Thinking of you!!

mkv said...

Well, hell. Looks like you need huge virtual hugs! Sending them your way. My husband and I went through this same thing...it just stinks.
xxoo
me

Jenna said...

Monica, I am so sorry. I am just going to e-mail you.

froggy mommy said...

Hugs to you. Really big hugs.

Holkyle said...

ugh...I just read this. I am sorry. Maybe ask him wht he is having such a hard time being fully supportive to you and excited about the new hope and chance of having a child? is it just him assuming doom? It is definitely fear based. He is afraid of hurt and pain it sounds like. By why is afraid to move past being afraid? That's what you should ask. It's like his safety spot. To stay in fear and hang onto that instead of trying to move back into love. Love in possibility and children.

(((HUGS))) love you girl...Holly

Lori said...

I'm here for you. If you need a girl's day out, let me know!