"IT'S NOT THE LENGTH OF THE GESTATION, IT'S THE EXTENT OF THE ATTACHMENT."


Tuesday, August 5, 2008

August 5th

Also known as Jack's due date.

I could have a one year old running around here. Well, I don't even know if he would be running, but he would be alive and he would be here, that I do know.

I should be posting pictures of my smiling cake covered baby. And his birthday cake with icing that I so carefully tinted to match the decorations. I would make him a tiger cake, not because I especially love tigers but because it's what my MIL made for Mr. H when he turned one and I wanted make a tradition out of it.

There are no pictures today. Not of cake, not of smiling babies, not of proud parents.

Nothing.

14 comments:

The Nanny said...

Today also marks the two-year anniversary of my beloved aunt's too early passing. As we came out of the restaurant at dinner tonight, we looked up at the sky and saw two beautiful rainbows--one big one, and one smaller, fainter one. One for my dear Aunt Becky, and one for sweet Jack.

Thinking of you today, and always.

Reese said...

((((Monica))))

Kristi said...

I'm so sorry, some days are so hard.
((HUGS))

Monica H said...

Thanks Nanny he was my rainbow baby.

Antigone said...

We're the less.

Time just keeps pushing us along.

Virginia said...

I"m so sorry....hugs.

Ginny

theviewfromthisplace said...

to have 'nothing' as you say is so awful, when in fact we should have so much. i am so terribly sorry your sweet boy is not with you today. i have no words to make you 'all better', because they fall short don't they?. just know that i truly and deeply feel your pain and that i send you the biggest hug ever. if i were with you i would quietly hold your hand.
J

Rachel said...

I am sorry, I know it is a day late. I wish that this wasn't the way things are.

mrsmuelly said...

Monica, I am so sorry. I hate this! (((((HUGS))))) to you.

christine said...

i'm here to say that i'm sorry for your loss. just remember that jack and samuel are dancing with angels now and be comforted that they're loved and protected. i tell myself that each day as i remember gaby and carmel.

christyna said...

I met a little boy named Jackson recently. he was 4 though. he was at soccer camp with Anders and all I could think about was your Jack. I'm so sorry.

Beth said...

My heart breaks for you. I can not begin to understand the pain you feel for the loss of your sweet Jack (and Sam). All I know to say is that I am praying for the healing of your broken heart. I am praying for the mending of strained relationships (ie mr. h and u) and that he will find some healing too. I know what it feels like to have a dream and not be able to acheive it...let's pray he finds some peace in trying yet again. i am praying...

Elizabeth said...

I'm so very sorry about your losses. Anniversaries are so hard. Thinking of you this week.

mkv said...

Sending you big hugs...and thinking about you since you're last post. I've been there and it is so hard. xoxo